I’m a bit strange.

Okay. More than “a bit.”

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Just two quick notes:  All of this was done in good fun.  And was quite random and spur of the moment. Voices are impersonated. Nobody was meant to intentionally fall down.

Furthermore, I didn’t mention absolutely everyone — and I feel bad about it as I had some pretty wonderful times with you all. Please don’t take it as a sleight if you’re not mentioned (or not mentioned much). You all are truly great.

Aside from all of that? Yeah. This is how it all went down.

You know what’s all the rage nowadays with the crazy, internet savvy kids?

Apparently it’s the MySpace — a world where teens can make their own websites (hence, the name! MySpace!) and chat with other likeminded teens.  The local televised news has been telling me about it. As well as how I should be fearful of the Internet because I’m a parent. I mean, he’s not a teen yet, and his preferred websites are Disney and FunBrain and Poptropica, but apparently he’ll be in dangerous territory soon enough.

But that’s not what I had in mind about what happens to be all the rage. What I was thinking of was “literal music videos.”

Someone started the craze by watching A-ha’s “Take On Me” and seeing how original yet bizarre the video was. It follows a storyline (very loosely) which doesn’t have much to do with the lyrics. So — they overdubbed a version of the song explaining the literal visualizations of the music video.  It was quite unique.

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A few others have come out, but the one I’ve found most recently which is quite wonderful is the literal video for Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart.”

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Just… brilliant. And there are so many others out there as well!

Anyway, I’m off on a great adventure for the weekend: I’ll be driving to Baltimore, boarding a plane for Louisville, and then driving another car to Lexington where apparently I’ll be driving to, of all places to a bowling alley. How bizarre is that?

ut I’ll be seeing many blogger friends — some of whom I’ve met in person and many of whom I haven’t quite yet. And that shall be the phenomenon of ConFab. (Or, if you prefer, ConFab, Baby.)

What is ConFab, Baby? Not quite sure — but it’s rather scary and intimidating if you heed the message in this official, yet not quite safe for work video:

Direct YouTube Link

Should be… interesting.

As a tribute to our wonderful hosts for the weekend, I wanted to do something special: something original yet not entirely felonious. And then I looked above at the first part of this post and realized what I should be doing — namely, a literal version of the ConFab, Baby video.

Which was far more difficult than I thought because the video pretty much literally follows the lyrics created by Fab and Turnbaby (with no apologies to Kid Rock).

So it was a challenge, but I think I followed through to an extent.  True, I don’t have subtitles (yet?) and the audio levels are quite distorted when I sing (along with myself, trying desperately to hit the high notes without touching myself too inappropriately).

Anyway — this is for you, Fab and Turnbaby. Thanks in advance for a lovely time. Literally.

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See you all soon!

Wow! First and foremost — thank you all for your wonderful birthday wishes.  You all rock. Even Miss Britt who made a crack about me being old.  I can’t wait until I get a cane just so I can thank you properly…

So — my original post sans hint was a bit… shall we say, improbable.  Who could simply guess a name in my head?  I did, however, get some pretty good guesses.

I decided to give you all a hint — one which I felt might likely give it all away rather quickly. And I was correct — it took someone all of three minutes to guess the correct answer from my hint.

So – what was the name in question? What did the hints mean? For at least one of you, the hints were a type of quaero totus lacuna, which is Latin for “copy what I put on the blog to help people out into Google and look for something remotely relevant.”  But for those of you who got it right off the bat, you knew that these three “hints” were actually the first few lines of dialogue of the repressed peasant in Monty Python and the Holy Grail:

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The first among you commoners to guess “Dennis” was Avitable.  He gets the t-shirt expressly made for the crew of The Wolfman. Coming to theaters this November.  Kudos to LeSombre, whall, Finn, and Janelle for also coming up with the correct name.

I must, however, give honorable mentions to the following individuals for some dreat guesses:

• B. E. Earl guessed that I would be named Romulu He cleverly took into consideration the Wolfman movie flair I was giving away. He chose Romulus over Remus because Romulus is the name of the town where the Detroit airport happens to be. Or something like that.
• LeSombre guessed “Joseph” for a variety of reasons, most of which escape me aside from that it means “he will enlarge.”  Oh really… ::whistles::
• NYCWD and Cissa Fireheart both chose the name “Sam.”  Cissa cited a fact that, on this day in history, Sam Houston led a Texan army to independence in San Jacinto. And Samuel Clemmens (aka Mark Twain) died in 1910 on this day. Dawg just chose it because he knows that I don’t eat ham. (Jury is still out on the green eggs.)
• Dave2 was close: taking a page out of one of the best TV sitcoms of all time, he decided to delve into the quintissential hottest supporting character from that show.  And he guessed Skippy — based on Alex’s buddy and Mallory’s geeky somewhat stalker Skippy Handelman on “Family Ties.”
• Hilly just thinks that I should be called “Dick.”
• Iron Fist thought that my name might have to do with the Jewish holiday which falls today called Yom HaShoah. Which is Holocaust Remembrance Day. Way to keep it light…
• MySpaceBarBroke and Miss Britt both decided on “Sir.”  Both of these lovely ladies are younger than I am; SpaceBar is incredibly sweet and respectful towards me. She always has been. Britt, on the other hand… well, she’s also been very nice to me, I suppose.  But she called me old.

• Finally, another tip of the hat to Dawg who took the “37″ reference to the other movie which references it: a wonderful film called Clerks. Kudos to you on this one; yes, I’ve aged all 37 years in a row.  I’ve decided that I will bestow NYCWD with a package of snowballs (yes, the confectioned donut treat and not the other stuff) the next time we meet in person.

Today was really amazing for me.  I began this blog slightly over a year ago and was new to this specific blogging community.  Since then I’ve become close to many of you.  Thanks for all of the birthday wishes and for being such a great community.

But wait — there’s more! While I’m revealing answers about stuff, why the heck not give you the answers to that 80s music quiz on my blog about three weeks back?  Here were the snippets; see if you can hear them now that you know what they are:

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“Head Over Heels” by the Go-Gos and “We Didn’t Start the Fire” by Billy Joel.  Nat and Hilly identified the Go-Gos, but the Billy Joel intro was a bit tough for you all. Don’t the two intros go quite well together, though?

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Many of you (Faiqa, Janelle, Hilly, B.E. Earl, Sybil and my brother) got The Fixx’s “One Thing Leads To Another.”  Nobody got that the eerie piano chords belonged to the intro for the Boomtown Rats’ “I Don’t Like Mondays.”

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Yes. “Obsession” by Anomotion. Practically everyone had that one.  The other? “Oh Sherry” by Journey frontman Steve Perry. Yankeebird got that in the round before the last one in which four songs were on top of each other. Go Yankee!

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A few of you got “Safety Dance” by Men Without Hats. Nobody figured out the opening organ slide to “Hip to Be Square” by Huey Lewis and the News.

Okay — let’s hear them all together one last time!

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Now do you hear each of these eight song?  No? Only me?  Okay…

A quick tip of the hat to my brother who calls himself, affectionately, Shiny’s Brother. I prefer the name I’ve given him in the blogosphere, Captain Awesome. I especially like it because I can almost feel him cringe at the thought of me calling him that. And imagining him in a tight superhero suit with tights and a bright orange codpiece and all.  Yes, he continues to be an inspiration for me, and he really had a lot to do with my obsession for 80s music.  Thanks, CA. Keep your feet on the ground and keep reaching for the sky.

And now, for no good reason whatsoever, here is a picture of someone’s butt. With a full color tattoo on one of the cheeks. Of a unicorn. A very special unicorn. One with rainbows. And a swastika armband. Spreading the rainbow-clad, unicornial message of white power.

On the other hand, you’re probably not interested. Tell you what — if you’re reading this in your feed reader and you actually want to see it, click through for the full blog post.  If you’re not, I certainly don’t blame you.

continue reading "What’s in a Name – Birthday Contest Winner Revealed!"

The Jewish holiday of Purim begins tomorrow at sundown and continues throughout the day on Tuesday.

Today was a very busy day — which included rehearsal of tomorrow evening’s reading of Megillat Esther (the Scroll of Esther), going to a costume shop  get the rest of the appropriate accessories (which had a massive going-out-of-business sale!), walking 3 miles roundtrip to deliver a package of Mishloach Manot (just for the exercise), and helping Avi decorate for Purim.

It’s one of my favorite holidays for many different reasons:  It’s a lot of fun. It comes at just the right time in the calendar. It has a great component for kids, as well as a hard R-rated narrative as well.  And, of course, booze.  What’s not to love?

The following video shows Av decorating the Mishloach Manot basket he’s making for his kindergarten buddy. Kind of like a “Secret Santa” type of thing. Except, of course, for the fact that Santa doesn’t make an appearance at this time of year.  You’ll see that he’s writing from right-to-left because Hebrew happens to go that way. It looks very impressive — unless, of course, you know Hebrew. In that case, it simply looks like a sloppy mess which has some resemblence to actual Hebrew letters. But for those of you who might not have those Hebrew literacy skills, just pretend that our son is a genius.

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Chag Sameach everyone…

Have you heard of Microsoft Songsmith yet?

If you haven’t — well, it’s Microsoft’s newest venture into the artificial intelligence entertainment business. Here’s the premise: connect a microphone to your Windows based PC and start singing.  The program will analyze the melody and come up with some musical accompaniment tailor-made for your voice!  You can learn more at the Microsoft Research website here. You can even download a working demo for free!

Microsoft sees this as a tool to help people become musicians. To challenge people to become musicians in their own right. But an entire community on YouTube has had some different plans.

You see, you can feed the vocals from other songs into the program, and it will output those vocals with a whole new tune. You can set the genre of music however you want, so it makes for some really interesting combinations.

For example — how about The Police playing “Roxanne” with a Carribean, steel-drum feel to it?

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What happens when you take Billy Idol and add a bluegrass twang?

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… or Weezer with a slow, ballad-laden piano?

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… or possibly the most ridiculous version of Johnny Cash singing “Hurt” you’ve ever heard?

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Some of them just sound… ghastly:

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Is anyone else fascinated by this? Or am I just easily amused?

Ladies and Gentlemen — welcome to Plagiarism Week ’09!

Today I dive right into one of my more creative regular features which I’m proud to say has been a big hit: my weekly “Snowy Tuesday” video:

Snowy Tuesday – 001 from Mike S. on Vimeo.

Hi everyone.

The following blog entry / vlog entry is actually targeted at one person specifically. And his name is Dave (or Dave2). He blogs at Blogography.com — which is quite wonderful.  You can even buy shirts and hats and playing cards with pictures of a bad monkey on them.  It’s really a wonderful blog. And unlike mine, his targets a general audience and doesn’t get all exclusive and snobby and earmark one specific individual.

Here’s the background: Dave is an avid fan of the Hard Rock Cafe franchise. He’s visited almost every Hard Rock on all seven continents of this planet, as well as the one they’ve built on the International Space Station.  When I mentioned on my blog, in passing, that I was enjoying a video game which happened to have a Hard Rock Cafe present in it, his interest was piqued. The game is Crazy Taxi 3: High Roller, and there is a world in it called “Small Apple” which emulates New York City. And about a block away from its equivalent of Times Square is a Hard Rock Cafe. The following video  is just me playing part of the game, lingering by the Hard Rock Cafe so that Dave can get a good view of it from all angles. I then provide an extra bonus — a 3-minute stint of me driving around the streets of “Small Apple” jumping over stuff and crashing into garbage trucks. And I include a running commentary throughout the whole thing.

If you’re Dave, this is possibly worth watching. If you’re not Dave — well, I’m surprised you’ve read this far.  Watch if you’d like. Dance along to the snazzy soundtrack if that’s your thing. Or skip it. Totally up to you…

Tomorrow’s post will be for everyone. I promise.

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Yes — the eighth season of American Idol premieres tonight. Are you excited? Psyched? Pumped up for some extreme Brian Dunkelmania?

In honor of this occasion, I’ve decided to repost my very own Idol audition from last year. I honestly think I did better than they said I did…

Direct YouTube Link

… a special bulletin.

Hilly is celebrating a birthday for a few more hours. What better way to celebrate in tribute than by making a total ass of myself?

*gulp*

List on the 3s is a meme. A rather good one, actually — one where I write a list on any date that has the number 3 in it. Such as today.

Oh no! Halloween is almost over in this part of the world! And I still don’t have a costume! What to do?

You may be thinking this right now — if you haven’t already gotten yourself to a Halloween party where you’ve been drinking non-stop.  If this is you, here are a few ideas for Halloween costumes that will likely get people talking about you and giving you dirty looks.




Top 5 Potentially Inappropriate Halloween Costumes (With Instructions)




5. Slutty Phillies Fan

This one is nice and topical! And rather easy to do.  Sluttiness mileage may vary:

• Put on a Philadelphia Phillies jersey and button it all the way up\
• Unbutton the top four buttons of said jersey.  Philadelphia is proud of its cleavage!
• Tease your hair out all big and 80s-like.
• Drink for two hours before going out. You deserve it — they’re the World Champions!
• For added effect — every seven minutes, yell out “Woooooo!” and torch whatever neighborhood you happen to be in at the time.

4. Studs Terkel (May 16, 1912 – October 31, 2008)

Since Mr. Terkel died earlier today, this would be an incredibly cutting-edge, timely costume!  Simply:

• wear a white fright wig (but cut out some of the hair sloppily first)
• find a pink checkered shirt at a thrift shop
• Clutch a copy of The Good War to your heart
• Put on some pancake white makeup so you look dead — and then some
• Stop breathing.

Seriously, though — R.I.P. Studs. You were a pretty amazing man — even in your final years.




3. Slutty Ashley Todd

Again, something relevant and for the times!  At least for the next few days…

• put on an orange Tennessee Volunteers sweatshirt
• rip the neckline for the slutty effect you personally desire
• using mascara, create a black eye effect around your entire left eye
• With a dull knife, carve the letter “B” backwards into your right cheek. This will be tough; you can probably use a shiny surface to ensure you’re doing it right. Like a side-view mirror on a car.
• When people ask about your costume, tell them that someone forced you to wear this costume because s/he saw a bumper sticker s/he didn’t like on your car.

2. Confused Cell Biologist Who is a Member of the Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, KS

This is a rather easy one — I apologize if you’ve thought this one out already and/or if you used it last year. But it’s simple, too!  All you have to do is:

• find a megaphone for prolonged shouting
• Wear a lab coat. (Wearing nothing under it? Bonus points for a slutty effect)
• Create a sign that looks like this — and carry it around:

• When people ask you what you’re supposed to be (and believe me — they will), state that you’re a confused cell biologist who is a member of the Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, KS.  Then grin as if you get the joke and they don’t because they’re inferior to you.

1. Slutty Trig Palin

Yeah. I’ll let you use your imagination for this one.