List on the 3s: Top 8 Things that are Only Funny at 2:30 in the Morning

“List on the 3s” is my meme where I write a list on any calendar day with a 3 in it. Since it’s November 23, I’m creating a list. A List on the 3s. Which is a bit superfluous. But at least I think I’ve gotten the point across clearly.

As I write this entry, it’s 2:30 in the morning on Sunday, November 23.  There is a lot running through my mind.  Tomorrow will be a pretty big day for me — details to come later. But, on the most part, I’m simply not allowed to go to bed right now.

That’s because I’m in the midst of staffing a youth group convention for Jewish high-school students from communities as far north as Baltimore and as far south as Virginia Beach.  We’re actually at Virginia Beach right now — at a convention hotel where our community of about 250 has been assembled since Friday at noon.  The convention ends this morning around noon.

As we just had the last evening of this convention — which includes many exciting activities including a dance and a somewhat-silly pageant called the “Mr. Seaboard,” the kids have been spending a lot of time trying to wind down as we approach a new day.  I’m stationed here in the hallway on the fifth floor — a sleeping floor where we have rooms filled with eleventh grade boys. Most of whom are already quiet and asleep. But since not all is all quiet on the Fifth Floor Front, I’m required to stay awake and in the hallway until I receive the all-clear from the person in charge of security and safety.

Being overtired in a hotel corridor has its perks, however. Other staff members volunteering at this convention have stopped by to keep me company for a bit. And since we’re all exhausted and devoid of energy, pretty much anything can make us laugh. For instance, the items on the list below seem to me, at this time, to be the funniest fucking things in the universe. Yet when I read this list in a few hours, I’m certain that I’ll shudder at how dumb all eight of these things sound.

EDIT: Due to circumstances beyond my control, I could not post this entry until many, many hours after it was written. And I found that, indeed, these all sound stupid when I’m relatively lucid. Although #6 still makes me giggle a bit…

Top 8 Things that are Only Funny at 2:30 in the Morning

8. When someone states “Come again?” into a walkie-talkie — and someone (me!) retorts with “That’s what she said!”

7. Cel phone pictures of sleepy people waiting in corridors at 2:30 in the morning

6. The name “Woody.”

5.That scene in “Coming to America” where Eddie Murphy’s preacher character (or was it Arsenio Hall?)  introduces the funky band called “Sexual Chocolate.”

4. Jewish people singing hard-core rap.

3. This video:

2. The thought that hotels still feel that shower caps are essential, in-room personal grooming elements.

1. Every single person I know’s Facebook status which, all of a sudden, all seem very clever.